I found my old journal.

Thursday, September 11, 2003

"Dear Journal,
Wow...there is SO much to write. School started a few weeks ago--it seems alright, I'm starting to find my classes and it hasn't been too hard so far. Also, Jon came home a couple of weeks ago, just for the weekend. We spent the week before he got home figuring out a way to see each other. His plan was to take me, Kevin, and his brother Andrew to see a movie. Jon and I would sneak out and see a different show alone.

Everything worked out perfectly. My mother let me go because we were taking our little brothers. When we got in, I said I'd go get the seats while the others got popcorn. I waited around the corner, as we had planned. Jon took them into "The Medallion" and then told them to find me while he went to the bathroom. Andrew was in on the plan, so he told Kevin they should just sit down and wait for Jon. So Jon and I met up outside the theater and went into "American Wedding." We watched the first 10 minutes and then Jon put up the arm rest and put his arm around me. A few minutes later, I kissed him. I kissed him! I never thought I'd do it first! When the movie ended, neither of us wanted to leave--but we had to get back to the boys.

The next morning, Kevin and Andrew were outside of Jon's house, so I went over there to wait for him. He came outside around 20 minutes before he had to leave to go back to school. I didn't even get to kiss him goodbye, because the boys were around :( Anyway, we've been talking online and on the phone every night since then. Last week he told me he loves me. It seems kind of early to me, but I definitely feel something too. He's so sweet--he always tells me how I'm the only thing he thinks about.

Everything is great. Except that my mother ratted us out about the movie, so we got into a huge fight. She told me I can't see him or talk to him anymore, but I told him that he really cares about me and I want to be with him. She thinks he's lying...so does everyone else. Because he's 19 and away from home, he could be out with girls every night and then come home and say he loves me and I would never know. It's true--he COULD be lying to me about everything. But then I think about how easy it is to talk to him, and how instead of going out to party with his friends tonight he was on the phone with me until 3am.

Jon's coming back in 8 days. He's picking me up from school and we're going to hang out for a few hours. I'm telling my mother I'm at a friend's house. She'll probably find out somehow eventually, but I don't care."


Goodness. Summer after 8th grade. Should've known.