And I Said, "What About Breakfast at Tiffany's?"

Mr. O = Our calc professor
Purple=Jen
Blue=Kathleen

Here's some necessary info for understanding this story:
In case you haven't read our other masterpieces, every day at 1:00pm Mr. O shits his pants to hard that his hair falls out.
Yesterday, Jen and Andy (her boyfriend) had a pretty long argument about the term "dominant hand." Don't ask.
Oh, also, "Detective Dan" refers to a buddy of ours who likes to state the obvious.
A lot.
Enjoy.

Jen: One sunny day, Mr. O...

Kathleen: ...returned home from Drake, and found (to his surprise)...

...that Rob Johnson was eagerly awaiting him in Mr. O's bed. Rob wore a leopard-print silk thong and oil all over his body to show off his bulging muscles, or so he though.

Mr. O was very confused. Why on earth would someone be in his bed in a silk thong covered in oil? Only one man could solve such a ridiculously obvious mystery. Detective Dan!! As DD arrived on the scene, his theme song could be heard in the background. It goes a little something like this:

"It is Detective Dan! Detective Dan! The biggest douche bag! DDD..DDan. Dan is a douche bag!
Dan tapped his foot to the song.

He wrote it himself, and was quite proud of his work. He loved alliteration. Anyway, seeing Rob Johnson in Mr. O's bed, he immediately knew what was going on. After all, he IS a detective. DD explained to Mr. O...

that Rob Johnson wanted to ride on the slide! The oil made him go faster.

Mr. O was embarrassed for not having realized Rob Johnson's simple intentions. He'd thought Rob had wanted to have intercourse, or something. Haha, silly Mr. O. Everyone knows Rob Johnson only has sex with...

...his left hand. Try as he might, no person, male or female had accepted his coming on to them. Even his right hand--his dominant hand--wanted nothing to do with him.

Suddenly, Andy Johnson arrived to explain the term "dominant hand," and to argue that if Rob Johnson could jerk it using his left hand, then they are both dominant.

Unfortunately for Andy, he had not yet grasped the concept that handedness has little to actually do with which hand a person uses to write, but how the brain functions. Somewhere, off in the distance, Jen's head exploded. However, these are minor issues. Back to the story.

From Mr. O's bedroom, Detective Dan heard Rob Johnson exclaim "Wee!! Water slide!!!" DD began to get VERY jealous. He loved water slides!! He rushed in the room, only to be severely disappointed. Rob wasn't sliding down a water slide, he was...

...highly delusional. In fact, they were not even really in Mr. O's bedroom. Rob Johnson tended to hallucinate often. Actually, they were all...

...in Mr. O's MWF calculus class. All of this had gone on in front of the 8 students who showed up for his lectures. This would have been super embarrassing for Mr. O, except that 5 out of the 8 kids were sleeping, 2 were writing this story in the back of the room, and one was masturbating. Unfortunately, 1:00 was fast approaching...

...and Mr. O had forgotten his adult diapers AGAIN!! He did not want the class to see his problem, so he...

...yelled really loudly to cover the noise, and blamed the smell on Detective Dan. No one doubted Mr. O's accusation, because Dan's breath smelled like shit and wieners, and was quite potent.

The intellectuals in the back of the room hypothesized that Dan's breath was the result of him giving Mr. O a BJ he had performed oral sex on Dan. However, we digress.
No one doubted the smell was a result of Dan's breath.

The fact is, the smell of Dan's breath actually masked the smell of Mr. O's shit. Also, Mr. O's yells were unnecessary. The sound of Mr. O shitting himself was covered up by the sound of Dan farting loudly, then laughing about it for 20 minutes.

Dan was a very mature individual, as is here apparent. Dan laughed so hard, he...

Gave birth. That's right, he had a baby right then and there. 3, actually. Unfortunately, just then Andrew Drummond showed up and slaughtered Dan's children.

Then, Andrew became wrought with guilt. So wrought, that he...

...called his buddy Jesus (Andrew and JC are tight, if you know what I mean) to fix what he had done. "Can you resurrect those things?" Andrew asked. Jesus took one look at the hideous babies and replied...

"FUCK NO!" Dan's children were very ugly.

Jesus hated ugly people, and gay people too. Needless to say, everyone in that room was going straight to hell. Except for Jen and Kathleen, because while they're both very very gay, they're also very very attractive.

And Jesus loves hot lesbians. His mother had been one. Always a guy to cut to the chase, he sent everyone to hell immediately, except for Andrew Drummond. Jesus sent Andrew to the heaven for Jehovah's Witnesses, thinking that was the worse punishment, anyway.

People are people so why should it be, you and I shouldn't get along?

I'm so disgusted in the way people treat each other sometimes. Why does society accept this kind of behavior?I was playing poker using the facebook application tonight, and at the bottom there's a little chat box where players can communicate with each other during the game. I hardly think the following is what this feature was intended for.

[Itamar Tehrani]: ur a lier, and ghetto
[Rubinder G.]: from this nigger
[Eldad Tehrani]: KOOOL king
[Itamar Tehrani]: nigger
[Rubinder G.]: yo were both brown
[Itamar Tehrani]: you fuck
[Rubinder G.]: think about it
[Itamar Tehrani]: fuck u
[Itamar Tehrani]: i dont know what you are
[Itamar Tehrani]: ur fuckin burrito
[Leon Thompson]: ahhh, thanx king!!!
[Rubinder G.]: im not a fukin mexican
[Rubinder G.]: i hate spics
[Rubinder G.]: u faggot
[Kathleen Wilson]: Wow, some heavy conversation in this chatroom. Can't we all just get along?
[Itamar Tehrani]: katheleen you have a fuckin crossdresser in your pics
[Kathleen Wilson]: Haha, drunken friend of mine
[Rubinder G.]: LOOOOOL
[Eldad Tehrani]: u dunt do that when ur drunk..
[Eldad Tehrani]: theres limits
[Trevor Francis]: trust me Kathleen you dont want any of that
[Itamar Tehrani]: ahhahahahaha
[Kathleen Wilson]: Any of what?
[Itamar Tehrani]: ahhahaha

[Rubinder G.]: yo itamar
[Itamar Tehrani]: ur dirty
[Rubinder G.]: im indian
[Itamar Tehrani]: rubin
[Eldad Tehrani]: like when ur durnk uno not to kill urself
[Itamar Tehrani]: dirty
[Eldad Tehrani]: u shud know not to be a homo
[Kathleen Wilson]: You guys aren't gonna me mean to me too, are you?
[Itamar Tehrani]: maybe katheleen
[Itamar Tehrani]: would it hurt your feelings
[Rubinder G.]: lmao
[Kathleen Wilson]: No, I just think it's a little immature for a bunch of adults to be acting this way.
[Kathleen Wilson]: Matter of opinion, I suppose.
[Itamar Tehrani]: immature?
[Rubinder G.]: wtfu no1 cares about ur opinion
[Itamar Tehrani]: like that fag in your picture wearing a dress
[Kathleen Wilson]: Incredible.
[Kathleen Wilson]: He's not gay, but you're free to think what you will.
[Rubinder G.]: yeah he is gay
[Itamar Tehrani]: i can careless
[Rubinder G.]: hes a fukin homo
[Itamar Tehrani]: he looks like an idiot
[Rubinder G.]: wearing a dress
[Rubinder G.]: it cant get any gayer
[Kathleen Wilson]: What if he was gay? Do you have a problem with homosexuals?
[Rubinder G.]: yess
[Rubinder G.]: holy shit
[Eldad Tehrani]: homos dont do that..
[Rubinder G.]: lesbians are okay
[Eldad Tehrani]: thats beond homo
[Rubinder G.]: but like men liking men
[Rubinder G.]: is fukin wrong
[Rubinder G.]: i wanna lay them all out
[Rubinder G.]: one by one
[Kathleen Wilson]: Well, I disagree with you completely.
[Rubinder G.]: well thats great but i dont care if u agree or dont
[Kathleen Wilson]: Fair enough. I don't care what you think of my friends.


[Rubinder G.]: no i was talking about how farming is soo much easier now that i have ur dirty nigger brothers and sisters to pick the cotton for me
[Rubinder G.]: is that understood
[Rubinder G.]: u faggot
[Kathleen Wilson]: Leon, you're okay being spoken to like that?
[Leon Thompson]: lol - wait till i see ur uncle
[Rubinder G.]: yea he is
[Rubinder G.]: cuz he knows he cant do anything about it
[Rubinder G.]: hes a fuking pussy
[Eldad Tehrani]: kathleen u instigator
[Leon Thompson]: its cool jathleen - hes an internet hardman
[Leon Thompson]: boring really
[Kathleen Wilson]: I just can't understand what would make someone want to speak like that to another human being
[Leon Thompson]: they hate u in canada too dont they
[Rubinder G.]: yeah ur one to talk u old man
[Eldad Tehrani]: its fukin internet
[Eldad Tehrani]: noones feeligns r getin hurt
[Eldad Tehrani]: relax
[Rubinder G.]: i kno
[Rubinder G.]: except this niggers
[Rubinder G.]: his and his wide nose
[Rubinder G.]: big forhead
[Kathleen Wilson]: I'd appreciate if you'd stop talking like that.
[Rubinder G.]: i dont give a fuk wat u appreciate
[Rubinder G.]: the sooner u understand that
[Leon Thompson]: go away now mate - ur boring and upsetting people
[Rubinder G.]: the better
[Leon Thompson]: stop showing off - nobody is impresses
[Kathleen Wilson]: Ah, forgot that anyone different from you is insignificant and obviously wrong.
[Rubinder G.]: am i upsetting u?
[Kathleen Wilson]: All apologies, Rubinder
[Rubinder G.]: yeah well try to keep that in mind next time
[Rubinder G.]: b4 u say sumthing errogant and stupiud
[Kathleen Wilson]: You're extremely ignorant, you know that?
[Kathleen Wilson]: And in the future, if you're going to call someone" stupid," you should probably spell it correctly.
[Rubinder G.]: ahah good one
[Rubinder G.]: u fat fuk
[Kathleen Wilson]: Whatever you say, pal.
[Rubinder G.]: i g2g now
[Leon Thompson]: say hi to ur gran for me - all of u in that 1 bedroom :(
[Rubinder G.]: leon
[Rubinder G.]: do u want me to whip ur nigger brothers and sisters?
[Rubinder G.]: pusswhole
[Kathleen Wilson]: You're disgusting.
[Kathleen Wilson]: I'm going to go ahead and leave now. Rubinder, I hope for your sake you grow out of this ignorant egotistical stage in your life.
[Rubinder G.]: did say u could talk?
[Rubinder G.]: how old are u?
[Kathleen Wilson]: Ah, sexist too? Is it because I'm a girl, or because I'm more articulate than you?
[Kathleen Wilson]: I hardly think my age is an issue, given that my intelligence and maturity levels are obviously much higher than yours.


Seriously, I was having such a good night, and then I was reminded how fucked up this world is. Don't get me wrong...you're entitled to your opinion, no matter how sick and twisted...but if you're going to hate, keep it to your damned self. Ignorance is an epidemic, and I would hate for men like "Rubinder G." to influence my future children. Grow up, people.

Don't think 'cause I understand, I care...don't think 'cause I'm talking, we're friends

I present to you story numero dos. It's not as good as the original, but then nothing ever is.

Again, blue= Kathleen; purpe= Jen; green= Dan

Jen: Let's write a new story.
While Mr. O was driving to work from his home in Ames one day...

Kathleen: Dan, who was in the passenger seat, put Mr. O's weiner in his mouth. Mr. O, overcome by the pleasure of Dan's erotic BJ, swerved off the road and...

Dan: ...drove right into a massive gel-filled dildo! Now this wasn't just any dildo...this was the world's largest dildo! And it was purple by the way, minor detail.

Dan had never seen anything so beautiful before in his life. Dildos were his favorite things in the world after cocks, and purple was his favorite color. He had to have that beautiful thing in his anus. Unfortunately...

Mr. O had already placed his 2-inch weiner in Dan's butthole, blocking it (barely) from this heavenly dildo. "Mr. O," Dan said to his lover gently, "you know that after the many many men who've buttfucked me, I can hardly feel your tiny cock in my anus." Mr. O understood, because even at a whopping 2.5 inches, Dan's dick was much too small as well. After much deliberation, the couple decided to...

Learn some math! Yay!!

So, the began to study math. Sadly, Dan could not understand the complex mathematics. Mr. O needed a new idea to teach Dan. Knowing Dan waas good at chemistry, Mr. O applied the concept to a chemistry problem. The plan worked! They began to study chemistry, but since chemistry happens fast, they...

...ended up having crazy, crazy sex.

And it was great, not like I just had a birthday great, but like I just got a new pair of space boots with moon dust on them great.

And that was quite great. However, they did not use a condom. Two months later, Dan found out...

...that Mr. O was pregnant with a rhinosaurus fetus. The same rhinosaurus fetus, in fact, that Dan had eaten just months before. Which is pretty fucked up, if you ask me.

And everyone knows that men can't have babies, so what it really means is that he either stuck it up his butt a few months ago or was storing it in his freezer...weird.

After much detective work, Detective Dan discovered that the rhinosaurus had been stored in the freezer. Mr. O had plans to feign pregnancy to collect child support from Dan.

Unfortunately for Mr. O (but fortunately for Dan), Dan was poor and now needed to work the streets giving blowjobs for crack. Err...child support money.

But dan would never work the streets because he has no respect for people who don't try!

Then a kind lady who worked the streets took Dan aside and explained what it meant to work the streets. "You perform sex acts," she explained. "I can have sex and GET PAID??" Dan inquired. He thought that was a great idea. He wanted to start work immediately. He...

...asked the nice lady if she knew of an unoccupied corner with a significant majority of male customers so he could start sucking cock right away. Dan loved the cock. The old lady replied...

"Sorry hun but you ain't gonna make no money with dim lips, they ain't no dick suckin' lips, dim is clit suckin' lips." Upon this news Dan was extremely happy because now this meant that he could eat tacos and get paid for it!!

While this sounded like a win-win plan, Dan became disgruntled to find that women do not have to pay for sex. He did not have any customers, and even if he did, he was not very good at it, anyway. Andy remained the only one who ate tacos.

Dan resorted to sucking cock, after all (despite that fact that his lips weren't quite cut out for it). Besides, pleasuring men was Dan's true calling, and he was passionate about his work.

But he hated the taste of weiner and loved taco so he decided that if he couldn't get business then he would have to start raping and assaulting extremely hot women civilians.

Civilians? Oh yeah, we forgot to mention that Dan was a male prostitute for the Navy. (Ironic, is it not?) However, no women civilians were on the sub when he sailed out to sea for six months.

Which ended up being good for Dan because, as previously mentioned, he absolutely LOVED the cock. Luckily for Dan, Mr. O was assigned to the same ship! The reunited and...

Scissored! He scissored me timbers!



End story #2.
Gosh, I hope my mother reads my blog.

What if I say I'm not like the others?

More calc notes. And by that, I mean we wrote a story.
Mr. O is our calc professor, Jen is my roommate, and Dan is my lab partner.
Blue=Kathleen Purple=Jen Green=Dan
The rest is self-explanitory.

Kathleen: I think we should write a story. I'll start. Continue on from where I leave off. Dan's playing too, he just doesn't know it yet.

There once was a man named Mr. O. All was well in Mr. O's life until...

Jen: He birthed a beautiful 8-pound baby boy.

Dan: But this was no ordinary boy, for he had super powers! Powers that could allow him to impregnate dogs with his mind...

This was due to the fact that Mr. O himself had been impregnated by an 8-pound baby dog. It was Kathleen's dog, Dudley, and they did it on Jen's bed...

That just happened to have Kathleen's sheets on it...

Well anyways, on this particular day something bad happened. It was so bad that he received a call during class and the horrific news made him shit his pants right on the spot.

This news was so terrible that all three strands of hair on Mr. O's head fell out, and he exclaimed...

"Damnit! I have shit on my pants in class, AGAIN! And, I forgot to wear an adult diaper today! And my hair fell out!" yes, the news was terrible, but his response to it was no different than his usual schedule. At 1:00 every afternoon, he shit is pants so bad his hair fell out. This had been happening for years.

Now what was this horrible news you might ask? On that fateful day he received a call from his wife: she walked into the house and to her surpise the child had a rhinosaurus fetus in his mouth. Yuck! What the hell could possess a child to do that?!?

Mr. O rushed home to find that his child actually had Kathleen's little brother in his mouth, which was much more reasonable because babies ate Kathleen's brother all the time. Mr. O could not be mad at his wife for her mistake, because Anthony closely resembled a rhinosaurus fetus, and was often mistaken for one.

Relieved, Mr. O kissed his son on the forehead and admired the baby's timely consumption of Kathleen's little brother, as his own father had done so many times before.

After the matter at hand was solved, Mr. O kicked back on his sofa and watched his favorite internet video...2 girls 1 cup!

Mr. O's baby sat down and watched the video with his father, and eventually shat Kathleen's brother out. Jen's BF Andy took the excrement into his genetics class for observation. "What is the probability," Andy asked, "that this shit is my shit?" Oh, did I mention Mr. O's baby's name? It's...

Andrew Russell Johnson.

Later that night after watching the video he realized he got a little jizz'em on the top of his head from when he blew, so he decided to take a shower. In the shower is where he encountered his next big adventure.

Mr. O busted out his favorite shampoo: Herbal Essences. He liked his three hairs to smell like peaches. This is where the big adventure began. Dan, drawn to the fresh peach scent, appeared in Mr. O's shower and presented him with his very own dick in a box. Tiny as it was, Mr. O greatly appreciated the gesture. I mean...it was REALLY small. So small, in fact, that...

...he needed the help of jeweler's glasses to see it, like it was a fine diamond. However, it was not. It was actually a...

...freakin' huge monster cock! Dan was just a little cold at the time...

...because Mr. O liked to keep the shower at a comfortable 32 degrees to keep his nipples nice and hard. Dan liked that about Mr. O. His hard nipples. He liked it a lot.

So much, Dan began to get turned on. Drawn to Mr. O's beauty, Dan began to suck on Mr. O's...

...wife's nipples! Hah, what did you think? Dan was gay? You wish!

Mr. O's wife was disgusted and pushed Dan away. "I like small dicks," she explained, "but not THAT small!!" This was okay with Dan. He was used to being rejected because of his microscopic weiner. "If only my tiny twig and berries was the worst of my problems," Dan told Mrs. O, ashamed. "God also cursed me with...

...the desire to be anally penetrated by large amounts of men simultaneously." It was an emotional confession for Dan, who had never trusted his secret with anyone before. Encouraged, Dan confided his next-deepest secret to Mr. O...

"Maybe you didn't hear. I'm a pretty big deal."

"...and by that, I mean I have anal warts."

"From the many men I have had sex with over the years, including Rob Johnson, which is how I became a big deal."



End story #1. Don't worry kids...more to come.

Here's a poem I wrote for you.

It's not easy up here, you know?
Watching the little ones fall
We were falling, once
Do you remember?

You fell for me
And I fell for you
And we both fell head over feet
But to be fair, I'd much farther to fall

And what goes up must come down
And I came down
And you came down
And we hit the ground together
But not running
Because running just gets you to the end faster
And neither of us is coordinated enough for that, anyway

And besides that, I think I was broken
From falling so far
And everyone knows the bigger you are the harder you fall
And I'm not so big usually
But I'd had a big breakfast of apprehension
And my wet hair probably weighed me down

But you sang me better
So I kissed your face and sang to you back
And you sang
And I sang
And our music was wonderful for a moment
And life was wonderful for a moment
And everything was wonderful
For a moment

But there's a time a place for wonderfulness
And this was not the time nor the place
For wonderfulness
Or beautifulness
Or any of those sorts of things
And even if you walk instead of run
You reach the end eventually
And things aren't wonderful anymore
You told me
Do you remember?

It's not easy up here, you know?
Watching the little ones fall
Listening to their music and wonderfulness
Wondering why we're up so high when in the end
We all fall down

This makes me sick.

I'm completely disgusted in the way some girls my age present themselves, and in how their actions lead men to group us all together under the same twisted stereotypes. I'm a decent-looking girl who goes to college, so obviously I must love to get trashed and fuck random guys. Or maybe, just MAYBE I came here to learn, make friends, and better myself as a whole.

A few days ago a guy wrote in my facebook honesty box. I know it was a boy because his name came up in blue...if you have an honesty box you know what I'm talking about. Anyway, this person (who wrote to me anonymously) is shown as "???"...I am shown as "you."

???
You are really freaking hot!

you
That's very sweet of you. Who might you be?

???
Someone that wants to get all up on you!

you
Well you can't very well "get all up on me" if I don't know who you are, now can you?

???
True, I have seen you around Drake.

you
Have we met?

???
Not yet, but I'm sure I will see you around the Dorms

you
Do you live on my floor? How about we skip the bullshit and you tell me your name?

???
Lol, you want to get right to the point I like that, but whats in it for me.

you
What kind of girl do you take me for?

???
lol

you
That's a little trashy don't you think? I'm not that kind of a girl. You could start by introducing yourself to me in person, maybe

???
Lol yeah thats true, your are not that kind of girl, but I hear that you can be a freak in bed.

you
And who did you hear that from?

???
That doesn't matter I just want to know if its true lol ;)

you
That's really none of your business.


???
Why don't you stop by my room tonight and we can get to know each other, you never know where the night might end ;)

you
That's ridiculous.

???
Lol well thats to bad then, I was looking forward to hanging out with you this weekend, I guess I will just have to find another really really hot girl to hang out with.

you
So you're just interested in sex, then. That's what you're saying, isn't it?

???
Lol never you think I'm that kind of guy come on. I'm just messing with you I think we should hang out sometime you seem like a really cool girl thats all.

you
So why don't you tell me who you really are?

???
Where would be the fun in that.

you
Fun? Okay, let's play a game. Give me a clue, yeah?

???
what do I get in return?

you
What do you want in return?

???
Not really sure what you could give me... hmmm.... what would a guy want from a girl like you thats a hard thing to think of.

you
Do you have a screen name or something we could talk on? This honesty box thing is SUPER lame.

???
lol I will have to make up a new one just for you.

you
Are you going to? IM me, my sn is "AudialSunshine"


At this point, we signed on AIM and further discussed the issue at hand. Part of me is sickened by the fact that I continued to talk to this shallow excuse for a man. The bold selections prove my point. Observe.


armadillothuder9 (12:37:06 AM): hi
audialsunshine (12:37:37 AM): hey you
armadillothuder9 (12:39:24 AM): I bet you look cute when u are mad
audialsunshine (12:39:46 AM): So this is fun and all, but how about telling me who you are?
armadillothuder9 (12:40:03 AM): oh I don't see where the fun in that would be
armadillothuder9 (12:40:19 AM): lol I bet all this is making you even madder
audialsunshine (12:40:32 AM): I'm not angry
audialsunshine (12:40:35 AM): just intrigued
audialsunshine (12:40:39 AM): So how about a clue?
armadillothuder9 (12:41:00 AM): A clue hmm yes a clue but we still need to figure out whats in it for me
audialsunshine (12:43:48 AM): Just give me a clue kiddo
armadillothuder9 (12:43:59 AM): ok im 20
audialsunshine (12:44:08 AM): Mmmk, sophomore?
armadillothuder9 (12:44:26 AM): nope
audialsunshine (12:44:35 AM): freshman?
armadillothuder9 (12:44:40 AM): nope
audialsunshine (12:44:43 AM): junior??!
armadillothuder9 (12:44:49 AM): lol nope
audialsunshine (12:44:56 AM): what the helllll
audialsunshine (12:44:59 AM): You're a senior?
armadillothuder9 (12:45:11 AM): well I am a smart guy you know
audialsunshine (12:45:43 AM): Where have you seen me?
armadillothuder9 (12:45:52 AM): around
audialsunshine (12:46:15 AM): But we've never met?
armadillothuder9 (12:46:22 AM): nope
audialsunshine (12:46:38 AM): No classes together?
armadillothuder9 (12:46:45 AM): nope no classes
armadillothuder9 (12:47:56 AM): I hear you are a poker player
audialsunshine (12:48:00 AM): I am
audialsunshine (12:48:06 AM): Are you in poker club?
armadillothuder9 (12:48:16 AM): nope
audialsunshine (12:48:21 AM): Who did you hear it from?
armadillothuder9 (12:48:29 AM): A friend
audialsunshine (12:48:39 AM): So a friend of yours knows me?
armadillothuder9 (12:48:46 AM): yeah they do
audialsunshine (12:48:52 AM): Can you tell me who the friend is?
armadillothuder9 (12:49:02 AM): now what kind of fun would that be
audialsunshine (12:49:13 AM): Okay, how does your friend know me?
armadillothuder9 (12:49:34 AM): through poker club and the dorms
armadillothuder9 (12:50:54 AM): you are getting close
armadillothuder9 (12:51:00 AM): how about I get something now
audialsunshine (12:51:05 AM): What do you want?
armadillothuder9 (12:51:21 AM): how about a sexy pic of you
audialsunshine (12:51:28 AM): That's incredibly trashy.
armadillothuder9 (12:51:37 AM): it doesnt have to be
audialsunshine (12:51:39 AM): I don't have any of those, buddy.
audialsunshine (12:54:28 AM): You'll just have to keep giving me clues, I guess...
armadillothuder9 (12:54:34 AM): no no
audialsunshine (12:54:45 AM): Well then you'll have to think of something else
armadillothuder9 (1:00:26 AM): not really happy with that
audialsunshine (1:01:12 AM): Well I'm not a tramp.
audialsunshine (1:01:23 AM): who's your friend in poker club?
armadillothuder9 (1:01:37 AM): oh he is not in poker club
armadillothuder9 (1:01:42 AM): do you know scott
audialsunshine (1:01:46 AM): scott who?
=armadillothuder9 (1:02:36 AM): buchowski
audialsunshine (1:02:53 AM): I don't think so, how does he know me?
armadillothuder9 (1:03:10 AM): he goes to school with you
audialsunshine (1:03:19 AM): Do you go to Drake?
armadillothuder9 (1:04:19 AM): yea
audialsunshine (1:04:35 AM): Mmmk, has Scott met me?
armadillothuder9 (1:04:38 AM): only in the summer though
armadillothuder9 (1:04:44 AM): yes
audialsunshine (1:04:51 AM): You go here over the summer?
audialsunshine (1:04:54 AM): I'm so confused.
audialsunshine (1:04:57 AM): How has Scott met me?
armadillothuder9 (1:05:06 AM): I forget
armadillothuder9 (1:05:08 AM): lol
armadillothuder9 (1:05:16 AM): this is really funny now
audialsunshine (1:05:24 AM): Why?
armadillothuder9 (1:05:39 AM): cuz I'm driving you crazy thats y
audialsunshine (1:05:50 AM): So are you at Drake now?
armadillothuder9 (1:06:08 AM): nope
audialsunshine (1:07:03 AM): How have you seen me around if you're not at Drake?
armadillothuder9 (1:08:58 AM): I go and visit friends there duh!
audialsunshine (1:09:25 AM): Where are you from?
armadillothuder9 (1:09:43 AM): Mn
armadillothuder9 (1:09:58 AM): havent lived there for a while though
audialsunshine (1:11:30 AM): So are you ever going to tell me who you are?
armadillothuder9 (1:11:51 AM): oh maybe. so your good in bed
audialsunshine (1:12:58 AM): Who said that?
armadillothuder9 (1:13:37 AM): no one i just figured you were are you saying that you are not?
audialsunshine (1:13:47 AM): I'm saying that that's none of your business
audialsunshine (1:14:01 AM): Why would you figure that I am?
armadillothuder9 (1:14:53 AM): Look at you your a good looking girl that is into the whole college thing
audialsunshine (1:15:29 AM): What does "into the whole college thing" mean? Not all college girls are like the chicks on girls gone wild, my friend.
armadillothuder9 (1:16:29 AM): duh just that I know you have been know to tip a few back from time to time
audialsunshine (1:16:45 AM): I actually don't drink, so I think you're mistaken.
armadillothuder9 (1:16:56 AM): whatever
armadillothuder9 (1:17:05 AM): well you have a good night now.
audialsunshine (1:17:17 AM): ah, because I'm not a drunk whore you don't want to talk anymore?

Honestly, what makes guys think it's okay to talk to girls like this? This is far from the first time I've been spoken to in this manner, and I'm repulsed by it. It's shocking and disturbing to me that young women are thought of the way that we are, and that so many girls continue to reinforce these stereotypes with their actions. Boys, listen up: we're not all drunks, and some of us can keep our legs together. Think before you speak.